Life is to be Enjoyed, Not just Endured

I have been feeling a little lost lately - lost in life and lost in my own thoughts.  I feel part of it can be attributed to some main parts of life that just feel out of whack and are beyond my control.  I also feel that another part of it is because I get so busy that I don't take the time to really step back and breathe.  So I have a fear and that fear is that I don't ever want to get lost again.  To give a sense of what I mean, that point in which you are striving but not really thriving. 
Not many people know this but the year before my accident I had been quite frustrated and lost.  The best way to explain it was that I felt like I had a hole in my heart and I knew that something was missing.  So when 2012 rolled around I was determined to pick up the pieces and move on.  Then life happened, February 20th,  life literally got flipped upside down and all around in one moment.  God forced me to step back from everything so that I could see his goodness and light in my life again.  Oh, the bittersweet taste of humble pie and little did I know that it would be one of the most humbling experiences of my life in the midst of it all.  Fast forward and I survived one of the biggest trials of my life.  I had a refreshed outlook and attitude of gratitude.  I had a more deep awareness of a loving Heavenly Father that knew exactly what I needed and was able to find myself again and recognize the everyday tender mercies in my life.   Since then my biggest fear is to fall backwards and to lose my way again.  I want to thrive not just endure and I want to use the second chance at life that God has given me and live it to the fullest.
With that said, I have felt myself slipping backwards in the past couple of weeks and it scares me.  I feel like I am floundering trying to figure out what in the world I am doing with my life. Perhaps, the real issue is doubt and lack of faith- in myself and in God.  I try to be in tune with the spirit and I try to align my will with God's.  I try to search, ponder and pray so that I can receive inspiration and direction.  So in my searching this week I came across this quote by Elder Richard G. Scott,
"I testify that when the Lord closes one important door in your life, He shows His continuing love and compassion by opening many other compensating doors through your exercise of faith. He will place in your path packets of spiritual sunlight to brighten your way. They often come after the trial has been the greatest, as evidence of the compassion and love of an all-knowing Father. They point the way to greater happiness and more understanding, and they strengthen your determination to accept and be obedient to His will."
This quote was one of those packets of spiritual sunlight that I needed to brighten my way.  To remind me that he is conscious of me and continually watching over me.  There is comfort to know that I am a Child of God and that He knows the desires of my heart.  And that "He is the way, the truth and the light.(John 14:6)"  And that no matter what happens and especially when I am lost - He will lead me safely home and encircle me with His arms of Love.
~April Kay~